Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity. — Dale Carnegie
2 min readMar 23, 2023
Here's a list of principles from Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People.
I. Fundamental techniques in handling people:
- Don’t criticize, condemn or complain
- Give honest and sincere appreciation
- Understand the other person’s desires and arouse an eager want
II. Six ways to make people like you
- Become genuinely interested in people
- Smile
- Remember people’s names
- Be a good listener, encourage others to talk about themselves
- Talk in terms of other peoples’ interest
- Make sure the other person feel important — sincerely
III. How to win people to your way of thinking
- The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it
- Show respect for the other person’s opinions, never say “you’re wrong”
- If you are wrong; admit it quickly and emphatically
- Begin in a friendly way
- Get the other person to say “Yes, yes” immediately
- Let the other person do a great deal of the talking
- Let the other person feel that the idea is his or her
- Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view
- Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires
- Appeal to the nobler motives
- Dramatize your ideas
- Thrown down a challenge
IV. Be a leader: How to change people without giving offence or arousing resentment
- Begin with praise and honest appreciation
- Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly
- Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing others
- Ask questions instead of giving orders
- Let people save face
- Praise every improvement “Be hearthy in your approbation and lavish in your praise”
- Give people a fine reputation to live up to
- Use encouragement; make the fault seem easy to correct
- Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest